To Watch Expectantly
“In the morning Lord, you hear my voice. In the morning, I plead my case to you and watch expectantly.” Psalm 5:3
For months and months, I’ve had that verse taped to my mirror in my room. As the days started and the evenings came, that verse would remain as one of the first things I saw each morning and before bed. I was recently in a season where things in life just always seemed to go sideways. Every door that I thought would be the one I would walk through, closed on me as I stood at the threshold. Job offers never came, all kinds of relationship issues arose, and constant feelings of anger and bitterness loomed over me daily…it was a constant merry-go-round for months.
I often wonder how long will God allow people to suffer just for them to experience the joy that He offers? All suffering does not look the same. Some sufferings appear in sickness or disease, some show up as mental struggles and drastic mood shifts, a few can be a constant strain of emotional burdens, while others emerge quietly, waiting to show itself later. Regardless of the trial, the suffering, or the burden, learning how to rely and lean on the Lord for your source of strength is not something you can always do expectantly.
“In the morning Lord, you hear my voice. In the morning, I plead my case to you and watch expectantly.”
The part that always gets me in that verse is to “watch expectantly.” To watch something expectantly is to have an excited feeling that something is about to happen, to wait with anticipation. When going through a trial, waiting expectantly for the light at the end of the tunnel can be hard. It can be nearly impossible when your tunnel vision blocks out any ray of hope that tries to shimmer through…and that is exactly how I felt. How was it that I saw that verse every day for months, would read it, plead my case to Jesus in my prayers…and yet still doubted? I knew what the verse told me to do…it told me to watch expectantly. To sit there and know that God was going to pull through for me. And because God is such a gracious and faithful God…He did. Even when I let my flesh dictate my feelings and posture towards Jesus.
That fear and doubt that I carried for months was curated by satan. As I look back on that season, I knew in my heart that He was going to show up. He always does. It was just a matter of when. And because I did not know the when, satan used that to turn it into an if.
My dear friend…do not let satan skew your view of our heavenly father.
We all know that life can get hard. It can get messy, exhausting, and burdensome. It can be impossible to see God as good when some circumstances would completely contradict His goodness. Staying in God’s word can be a challenge and a battle at times when the world and satan actively works against you every second of every day. Trying to stay encouraged and prayed up can be heavy and a hard habit to get back into.
So, I challenge you to tape a verse on your mirror.
Let it reside in a place that you would call your own and safe. A place that you see every single day without even trying. Just the mere presence of God’s word being visible to you every day will threaten satan schemes. I am a firm believer that the presence of God’s word can penetrate any wall or barrier that satan tries to create between you and our heavenly Father.
My vision of life was still skewed for a little while longer as I let that verse remain taped to my mirror. But fast forward to now, as I look on the blessings that God has poured out on me, I realize that during that season of stagnant and fear, what I mostly remember is getting ready, looking in the mirror and seeing that verse every single day.
Though I waited expectantly, I also doubted tremendously. I worried frantically, and I feared frequently. Despite all of my doubts and fears and second guesses, He still knew that truly my heart waited for Him…expectantly. And as my heart became in a posture of expectancy…. He moved abundantly.
What verse are you taping to your mirror today?
