I was not Born to die by Yolanda Lugo
At 14 years old, life is just starting. High School, friends, and no “adult responsibilities.” I was dating a pretty popular kid in school, so I felt like I had made it! But why were thoughts of suicide such a reality? Why was walking into a street when cars were coming an invitation to “freedom?” With my arms raised high, hair flowing, how will this car hitting my body feel? Depression is real; it chased me and haunted me because it was my friend.
I witnessed a family member try to commit suicide right in front of me, so I was in good company. This depression stood with me all through my teenage years and adulthood. No one knew but the mirror I looked at every night in silence. Adulthood came, and as my relationships failed, I turned to heavy pornography. One saved video turned into hundreds. How and at what point did it get so bad? How can it be? I grew up in church. I was doing well! I was happy. Those were the best 10 years of my life until I walked away.
With a life of partying, drinking, and pornography, I figured, “This is life!” That was until I had a real encounter with Jesus Christ. I had never felt so loved in all my life. It was an encounter so strong that years later, I still cry at the very thought of worship. My gratitude and offering to Jesus are me! It's my entire heart. It’s the very thought of Him when I wake up; I smile because when I figured depression was my friend, Jesus revealed to me that it was a lie. God was my friend. He sustained me; He chose me! I wasn’t born to die! I was born to live! Live in freedom! Be in freedom and walk in the freedom and authority He gives us to set others free! Did you catch that? Through Jesus’ name, we get to set people free!
What does being FREED mean to you?
Freely I have received, so freely I will give.
What are you FREED from?
Depression, suicide, mental abuse, shame, anger, lust, pornography, and self-pity.
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